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South Park\Jesus fucks up Santa

ceredwensirius in rs_small_gifts

Fic: An Annoying Christmas Miracle for catbirdfish

Title: An Annoying Christmas Miracle
Author: ceredwensirius
Recipient: catbirdfish
Rating: PG13
Highlight for Warnings: *AU where Sirius didn’t die in book 5, character death (sort of, but not really), unreliable narrator (not terribly so, but Sirius sees things the way he wants to), angst but I end it happily, and last but not least, a cheesy Christmas ending*
Word Count: 3371
Summary: Sirius sees the world, and Remus especially, through a jaded lens. If he’s wrong, it means James has been right all along, the tosser.
Author's notes: catbirdfish , I really hope you enjoy this. I tried to incorporate as many of your likes as possible. I actually used bits of all three of your requests in this, though on number 2 it is a little more subtle. I’ll let you read and see what I mean. There is some background to this story that I do not show, but there are enough hints and clues I think to put it together. EDIT: Major thanks to brighty18 for the beta



The world had ceased to make sense to Sirius a good while ago, so it wasn't all that surprising when the rules changed on him once again. Remus had been watching him all night. Every time Sirius happened to glance in Remus’ direction those familiar, hazel eyes were on him. Rather than focus on this unexpected development, Sirius let the hum of voices in the pub, the clinking of ice against glass, lull him into a trance. The smoke from his cigarette curved and wheeled, trailing intricately in white-grey whorls up to the ceiling. There the smoke dashed against the spinning blades of the fan, adding to the already hazy atmosphere. The Christmas lights strung about the pub had seemed harsh and garish to him at first, but diffused through the cloud of smoke, the lights had taken on an almost romantic glow. Out of the din, one voice cut in, grabbing his unwilling attention. Sirius looked up and smiled at his godson.

“‘Nother round?” asked Sirius, smiling and playing the role of dutiful godfather. He was here in this pub for Harry's sake, had planned the celebration himself in honor of Harry's engagement to Ginny, and his obvious distraction was rude. He was elated for Harry, at least in as much as he could be elated for anything. Truthfully, though, Sirius was just going through the motions.

Sirius wasn’t so drunk that he couldn’t see the concern in Harry’s troubled eyes. Harry was usually worried about something or someone. The boy thought too much. Harry stalled, licked his lips nervously, and fingered the large glass of ale in front of him. Sirius could see that Harry was searching for a non-awkward way to ask if Sirius was all right. So long as Remus continued to send heated looks his way, Sirius was going to be pretty fucking far from all right. There was really no way to say to his twenty-year-old godson that his newly-divorced ex-lover had been trying all night to get his attention and that he had no bloody clue what to do with that. That information would give Harry an aneurysm.

When the silence had stretched too long, Sirius realized he was going to have to send Harry a life-preserver. “Before you ask; I'm fine, Harry. Now, do you want another round? Last I heard, we were here to celebrate.”

“Party seems to be breaking up a bit,” replied Harry. Sirius looked around and was surprised to see the table was short about fifteen or so guests. “Ron and Hermione just left,” continued Harry, and then paused uncomfortably. “They tried to say good-bye and to thank you for tonight, but you were a bit… well…”

“I'm just a little distracted this evening. I apologize, Harry. I know I shouldn't be on such a special occasion.” Now Sirius paused awkwardly. “I - I don't really think you want to hear the explanation.”

Sudden arms wrapped around Sirius' neck, interrupting his conversation. Pink, spiky hair bloomed into view like a demented, tropical flower and lips were pressed to his cheek. “We're heading out,” said a familiar voice. Sirius startled at the intrusion, then relaxed and smiled at Tonks.

“So soon? I never see enough of you,” he protested. It was a feeble thing for him to say because they both knew that was mostly Sirius' fault.

Tonks didn't correct him. She never corrected him. She was there when he needed her to be and faded into the tapestry of family and friends if that was what he required. “I know; I'm sorry,” she said. Sirius noticed a quick flick of her eyes in Harry's direction. Harry instantly turned his attention to Ginny and away from Sirius and Tonks. “Remus and I rarely get an over-night sitter and I want to take advantage.”

“You two have fun, then,” said Sirius. Mentally, he pulled away, feeling a sudden surge of defensiveness. Apparently the rules had changed again, only now it meant Remus was a bastard for sending those looks his way all night.

“Silly man; not me and Remus,” chided Tonks, and then lowered her voice. “See the fit ginger making his farewells?”

“Charlie Weasley?” blurted Sirius, a good bit louder than he intended.

Tonks pinched his neck. “Keep it down. Neither of us want Molly getting wind. We both just need--”

Sirius put his hand up. “I get the idea, please don't spell it out. I changed your nappies once or twice.”

“You're turning into an old man and a prude, you dear thing,” she cautioned, and then kissed his cheek again. “Speaking of which, I have something to say before I go.”

“It isn't about Charlie, is it?” he said with a grimace of mock pain. Tonks pinched him again, this time on the arm.

“Cut that out, woman!” Sirius shied away from the light pain, but laughed all the same. He sent a knowing smirk to Charlie who was hugging his mother's neck and glancing nervously at Sirius and Tonks. “Now, what is so important, hm?”

Tonks curved around Sirius in order to face him eye to eye. Her voice dropped again as she spoke. “Let the past worry about itself, Sirius. There's nothing to be done about what has gone on before, and you have a life to live.”

“You're giving me platitudes? What on earth for? No, don't answer that.” Sirius dropped his voice to a low rumble. “Go on, you and your boy toy. You're making no sense at all. Maybe he can pound some into you.”

“Oi! That is entirely unfair!” complained Tonks. “I say one little thing about my needs and you turn prude, but you get to say whatever you like?”

Sirius gave her a cheeky grin. Somehow, she had always lightened his moods. He wasn't even sure how she did it. “I'm your elder. Show some respect.” Tonks muttered something under her breath Sirius didn't quite catch and gave his head a light, playful shove.

“I want to see more of you,” Sirius said to her back. “And tell your mum hello. I would have liked to have seen her tonight.” He watched, highly amused, as Charlie waited a full five minutes before following Tonks out. Those two couldn't have been more obvious.

The break in his usual melancholy ended with Tonks and Charlie's departure, and the dark blue and grey that made up his regular malaise oozed back into focus. He began to retreat to the more familiar corners in his mind. As his gaze slid back to the alcohol in front of him, he caught Remus staring again. Had Remus made up his mind to unnerve Sirius tonight? It certainly seemed he was bending every effort to that end.

If so, Sirius would have spoken more with Remus had his behavior not been so aberrant from the usual. They were friends, dearest and best, with a long, and, at times torrid history, so why was he so odd tonight? Sirius needed more alcohol to cope with this, and raised his glass to Remus in silent toast, hoping that whatever the reason for the change in Remus, it would pass quickly enough.

If it were anyone but Remus, Sirius would have chalked it up to a poor attempt at showing sexual interest. Remus was long over Sirius, a fact Sirius had grudgingly come to accept. They had spent a lot of time in each other's company during the second war, first Sirius at Remus' parents' farm in Kent, and then later when Remus stayed with Sirius at Grimmauld Place. No rekindling of their former relationship had occurred. Sirius had finally realized there were too many words, too many years, and too many graves between them.

Sirius stared morosely into his ale. On impulse, he stood up and excused himself to the loo. He felt eyes warm on his back as he headed to the gents. No sooner had he stepped up to the urinal, Sirius heard the clearing of a throat. Had Remus quietly followed him in? This was a family pub, and, while he was fairly certain the odd one-off was achieved in here, he was equally certain Remus' sense of propriety would overrule any insalubrious designs he might have on Sirius.

“You certainly have a strange way of letting Remus know you return his interest in you.”

Sirius groaned. Not this tosser again. “Aren't you supposed to be on a puffy cloud somewhere and not disturbing me while I piss?”

“You keep telling me I'm just a product of your diseased mind. Why don't you tell me why I'm not luxuriating on my puffy cloud?”

“James, go the fuck away.”

“At the moment, I've got nothing better to do than be a pain in your arse, soooo… no.”

Sirius zipped up and turned around to face James. He wasn't a day older than the last time Sirius had seen him in life. His hair still stuck up like a flag-pole in one place and his glasses still rode down the bridge of his nose. Through James, Sirius could see the sinks just behind him, the effect no less disturbing than the first time this had occurred.

“He's had plenty of chances to show his interest, and that was before he went and got himself married.”

“I find it fascinating that you don't hold a grudge against your cousin but you do Remus.”

“It isn't a grudge,” grumbled Sirius. Just to be an arse he walked through James to the sinks.

“I've told you that I'm not a ghost,” said James, laughing. “That has no effect on either of us.”

“No, you're just the inconvenient take-home toy surprise.” Sirius turned on the tap and splashed some water on his face. If this hadn't happened repeatedly since his near-death experience, he'd think this was due to the drink.

James laughed. “Who knew you'd become such a grumpy bastard? Just forgive him already. I've already told you you're reasons are all shite.”

“Right. I'm done talking to myself. Unless you plan on following me to the table, fuck off.” Sirius dried his hands and stepped toward the door.

“You still love him, Sirius.”

Sirius paused with his hand on the door. “Maybe, but he stopped loving me a long time ago, James.”

As Sirius returned to the table, Harry was helping Ginny into her coat. Ginny smiled at him and put her arms around his neck. “Thank you for the lovely party,” she whispered into his ear.

Sirius kissed her temple. “It was my pleasure, I assure you.”

“I'll come over to yours in the morning,” said Harry. “And thank you, Sirius.”

Sirius nodded, feeling something tight constrict in his throat as he watched the pair of them. Sometimes they reminded him of James and Lily so much it hurt.

“James,” muttered Sirius disgustedly. His mind had been playing tricks on him since his brush with death at the battle of Hogwarts. Sirius shook himself to banish his unsettled emotions. He paid the tab and turned to leave, noticing that Remus wasn't anywhere to be found. That was just as well. He had feared Remus might wait around to corner him and give voice to the thoughts behind the weighted looks. Sirius retrieved his cloak, donning it and wrapping a scarf about his neck, before stepping into the cold of London in late December.

“Sirius…?”

Sirius halted, his breath catching in surprise. He looked at his boots for a moment before putting on a fake smile for Remus.

“You'll catch your death out here,” said Sirius, pulling his cloak a little tighter. He fidgeted awkwardly, his eyes on the street and the tall lamps glowing brightly in the dark. That was easier than looking at Remus.

“I --” began Remus, and then paused.

Sirius nodded, still looking away, and waited for Remus to speak again. Snow was just beginning to come down in small, sparse flakes. The flakes caught the light in turns, blinking in and out in the freezing dark.

“Yes?” prompted Sirius, feeling discomfited by the stretch of silence.

Remus took a halting step closer. Their breath misted in the cold air and still Remus was quiet.

“I'm cold, Remus,” said Sirius finally. “Whatever it is--”

“You have to make everything so hard,” Remus murmured quietly. His breath made little clouds in the freezing air. “Can you please just wait a moment? This is difficult for me.”

“I don't know what you're talking about,” said Sirius defensively, his voice much louder than Remus’ had been. He stepped off the kerb and onto the street and began to walk away. He needed distance and resented the implication that he was the one to have made things difficult between them.

Remus put a hand out, catching Sirius on the arm. Sirius stilled immediately, but didn't turn. He was either too drunk for this or not drunk enough, though he wasn't sure which.

“Please,” said Remus.

Sirius turned, surprised at the plaintive, urgent quality to Remus’ single spoken word. Sirius took a breath and raised his head to meet Remus’ gaze. There was pain in Remus’ eyes, and regret. Sirius shook his head. He couldn’t do this. Not now, not tonight, and maybe not ever.

“Remus, don't,” said Sirius quietly. “I'm not blind, you know, but I --”

“You’re never going to forgive me, are you?” asked Remus. It seemed rhetorical to Sirius so he let the statement stand, neither refuting nor confirming. “I just wish we could talk about it,” Remus added, though he sounded discouraged.

“We’ve had time to talk, Remus.” Sirius shrugged the hand off his arm and pulled away. “We had time in Kent and we had time in London. Time’s up.”

“You must be joking! You were a mess!” Remus grabbed Sirius by both shoulders and turned Sirius to face him. “There was also the minor issue of keeping Harry alive and a war, if you’ll remember.”

“Apparently my cousin was ready for a relationship despite the war and did you ever consider that I was such a mess because I didn’t have you?” Sirius harshly bit out, and then blinked. He hadn’t meant to say so much.

Triumph flickered briefly in Remus’ eyes. “Sirius, please, come to my flat, or let’s got to yours, and talk. I don’t want to do this on the street in the cold.” Remus took a step closer, the timbre of his voice dropping slightly, becoming more intimate. “What will it hurt to hear me out?”

Sirius shook his head again. He’d been abandoned when he needed Remus the most. Well, not abandoned, exactly. Remus had been there for him, but it wasn’t the same. At the farm, was where Sirius had first let his guard down. He was safe, he was with Remus, and all he’d wanted was to crawl into Remus’ bed and cry for a year. But Remus, he’d made no overtures, had never let Sirius know he was still wanted. That hadn’t changed in London and then the bastard had married, and damn it, this was too little, too late.

“Just some tea, how about?” said Remus stepping closer once more. The fingers from one hand slid over from Sirius’ shoulder to cup his jaw. Sirius resisted, lifting his chin to avoid the contact. “You still like your tea with a splash of milk and two sugars?” persisted Remus

“We had tea with Harry last week. That proves nothing,” whispered Sirius. Whatever quiet battle he was waging with Remus, he could feel that he was losing. His heart thrummed like a trip-hammer in his chest.

“Maybe this will, then,” said Remus. His fingers closed firmly around Sirius’ chin, pulling it down. Remus tilted his head up and met Sirius’ mouth with his own.

Sirius could feel the tremble through his whole body. How long had it been since he’d given up hope of this ever happening again? His pride told him to pull away, but his heart, oh, his heart rejoiced. Caught between the two, all Sirius could manage was to remain still as Remus’ lips moved gently against his own, coaxing and encouraging Sirius to respond. Remus’ tongue flicked Sirius’ lips lightly, then soothed with more determination. The ages old, yet achingly familiar feeling proved more than Sirius could withstand. Hesitantly, he parted his lips. At the first touch of Remus’ tongue to his, Sirius was lost, returning the kiss with equal purpose.

Sirius was maneuvered against the brick wall of the pub, a thigh sliding between his legs. Sirius gripped one shoulder, the other hand sliding into Remus’ short hair. It felt like coming home, all the doubt and uncertainty melting away under Remus’ touch.

“We made a mistake,” said Remus, pulling away. He stroked Sirius’ dark hair, curling it between his fingers wonderingly. “I’ll never regret Teddy; I can’t, but we should never have married.”

“You never said anything about us. Not one word in six years. If this is about the divorce; if you’re just--”

“We’ve been divorced a year, Sirius,” said Remus patiently. “It’s nothing new. I think you tell yourself it is so you can go on punishing me.”

Sirius turned his mouth down in a frown which Remus promptly kissed away. “You shut me out, Sirius. You have for a while now. I guess tonight I decided I was tired of being the villain in your melodrama. Isn’t this so much better? Isn’t this what we both want?”

Sirius couldn’t deny the truth of it. He nodded and was rewarded with a smile and another kiss from Remus.

“I know you’re hurting, Sirius,” said Remus gently. “I know you have been since before the war ended, since Azkaban, really. I know that dying, for however briefly, affected you more than you want to admit. I know you, Padfoot. I think it’s time you let me take care of you for a change.”

Sirius pulled his arms tight around Remus and buried his face in Remus’ neck. He felt hope for the first time in years, and peace. And love.

“Okay,” whispered Sirius. Tension Sirius hadn’t realized Remus was holding onto seemed to melt from his person. Remus’ whole body relaxed in Sirius’ embrace.

“You’re going to be fine, you know,” murmured Remus against Sirius’ lips. “There’s nothing wrong with you I can’t fix.”

“I may just put that to the test,” warned Sirius through a smile he couldn’t repress, his dire words losing much of their effect.

“Let’s go to my flat,” said Remus. “I know yours isn’t ready for Christmas yet and I want to light the candles on the tree with you tonight.”

“You still do that?” asked Sirius, “the candle thing I mean. I remember in our flat—” Sirius abruptly stopped. Those were happier times, and while he hoped he didn’t want to presume.

“I may have been a bit hopeful tonight would go well,” admitted Remus. “I wanted to be prepared; I wanted to remind you how good it could be.”

Sirius kissed Remus hard, quite suddenly and without warning. He was about to suggest Remus Apparate them to his flat when he caught sight of James leaning against the building across the street. James seemed to glow with an unearthly light - which was a shame as it made the smug look on his face unmistakable even from this distance. Sirius really hated it when James was right. James waved at Sirius and then, in a bright flash of light, winked out of existence.

“What on earth?” Remus quickly turned around, his hands sliding to Sirius’ waist.

“You saw that?” said Sirius incredulously.

“What was it?” said Remus, turning back around. “All I saw was a flash of light against the bricks behind you.”

Sirius opened his mouth, then closed it. He thought for a moment and then tried again. “How about we leave it at an annoying Christmas miracle for now, and I’ll explain the rest at yours.”

Remus gave Sirius a strange look, then nodded. As Remus wrapped his arms around Sirius and cautioned him to hold on, Sirius sent a silent, grudging thanks to James, and then felt the sudden, tight pull of Apparition.

~*~

Comments

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Oh, I love this, and wish it would have happened in canon! ♥
Believe me, me too. It did happen! They lived happily ever after and there was no Veil and la la la la, denial IS just a river in Egypt.
Ahhhh this was so good. New personal canon! :D
Aww, that is very sweet of you to say. I don't suffer from denial, I quite enjoy it.
That information would give Harry an aneurysm.

What a great line. These characters have a great depth in a few words. I loved James and his advice.
Thank you. I hoped the back story would make sense with the few clues I provided. James is always fun, dead or alive!
I'm so glad you liked it. I tried to work in a little of everything and still have it be an AU. It would have been longer, with more backstory explained, but I was writing it right about the time my computer and my dog had a fight. I wrote this on my mom's computer and I had to do so in a hurry. I'm glad to know that the hints made sense.

James is such fun for me. I've played with him a few times now and he always makes me laugh. I'm glad you liked him.

The conversation was loaded. I know it is written in such a way, that only the two of them really know what they're talking about insofar as details and such, but I'm pleased that you liked it.

Thank you for the lovely review and Happy Holidays.
You know I love this, but I could not let the moment slide without making a public spectacle of my love for it. In fact, my only complaint is that you did not actually use your mother's suggested title. I will always think of it as "A Christmas Love Story."

Anyway, this was fab. I love how truly adult they are. These are not boys, these are thirty-to-forty-something men with actual adult issues and actual adult reactions to things. That's too rare in fanfic sometimes - mine included.

I may have said this before, but one of the best things (out of many good things) about this is Sirius' interactions with other characters. I love how truly avuncular he is with Harry and Ginny and how he and Tonks truly seem like family. That's awesome. And, of course, James:“I find it fascinating that you don't hold a grudge against your cousin but you do Remus.”

“It isn't a grudge,” grumbled Sirius. Just to be an arse he walked through James to the sinks.

“I've told you that I'm not a ghost,” said James, laughing. “That has no effect on either of us.”

“No, you're just the inconvenient take-home toy surprise.” Sirius turned on the tap and splashed some water on his face. If this hadn't happened repeatedly since his near-death experience, he'd think this was due to the drink.

James, despite being dead, is still perfectly James and hence the only one (besides, perhaps, Remus) who can stand-up to Sirius and say it like it is. How cool is it that they continued that relationship beyond the grave?

Anyway, enough rambling. I enjoyed this immensely as always.
Lol, but if I named it that then I would be honor bound to tell her and then she would want to read it. You see why this is a bad idea, yes? Besides, you were the one who suggested this as the title!

I am so pleased that they come across as adults. The things that Sirius is feeling aren't all that uncommon. I like him flawed and struggling with those flaws.

I can write strictly Remus/Sirius interaction but I find that I rarely do. I don't even think about it. I think it stems from the source material being so rich in interaction whenever Sirius was around. I think it anchors me to be honest.

I love James so much! He is always such fun for me. I'm so glad you liked him! I think you are exactly right. There are only a handful of people who would stand up to Sirius and James and Remus are definitely at the top of a very short list. I think that would be true dead or alive!

Thank you for doing me the beta and for this lovely review.

You always come up with such interesting scenarios! I really liked this. The use of James was great, and I loved your description of the bar--very nice atmosphere in the details. I'm so glad they came back together in the end. It definitely made me curious about the backstory.
Thank you for that. There is so much Remus/Sirius out there that I do try to avoid covering familiar ground. It's tough because there have been some seriously gifted writers in this ship.

James is always awesome. I really do adore him! He always makes me laugh!

Well, they had to come together. Sirius just had a kick to the ego he was having trouble getting over. Remus sorted him. :)

Thank you for the review!
Yay! Somebody else is also thinking about Tonks/Charlie!I've never thought that I could like an AU story this much, but it goes among my favourites!I simply loved the way you gave depth to these characters.
Thank you so much! Glad you enjoyed the side pairing there. I think there is a lot to work with and if I gave them depth, well, then thank you.
Yes, the guys are back where they belong with each other. Wonderful fic, and it shows just how well these two fit together. Very nice ending.
I love AU. And fix it fics. I'm also a sucker for a happy ending. Thank you for the review!
This is great! You really make Sirius and Remus manly in your stories. I like that Sirius seems as well adjusted as most of us now in this too. Like they are ready to get themselves together and get on with it now!
You really make Sirius and Remus manly in your stories.

Aren't they though? Each in their own way, they are strong, resilient, bearing their emotional burdens in canon with a stoicism that would break most people. I can't see them as anything but emotionally rugged.

I like that Sirius seems as well adjusted as most of us now in this too.

He's in pain, not nuts. But then, that is how I see him in canon.

Like they are ready to get themselves together and get on with it now!

Definitely! I have a feeling when Harry floos to Sirius' flat in the morning it will be empty, *grins*

Ghost James? Oh wow! :O :D

I loved this! If only this had happened in canon we can preten it did, yus?, I loved how belieavble every thing was. Like how they didn't just fall into bed straight after POA, the messiness of divorce, poor Sirius trying to get over the trauma of Azkaban and his near-death experience.....all great! And of course Tonks, loved her in this :D (Tonks/Charlie? My personal canon!) I loved how Sirius held a grudge agaisnt Remus but not her, it seemed so very Sirius (he's a silly one at times, isn't he? :P). This was tinged with just the right amount of post-war sadness, but ended so sweet and perfectly :). Great fic, merry christmas!
It did happen! Just exactly like this! No pretending necessary!

I like Tonks, and I adore Teddy (he's the only next gen kid I really do like). I didn't want to take any of that away. I did want her to move on though, and Charlie is my favorite Weasley.

James is great fun, dead or alive. I loved sticking him in here and giving Sirius a solid boot in the arse.

Sirius has lost so much, I just can't take Tonks away from him too. His grudge against Remus was the logical answer, at least in my mind.

Thanks you for reading and commenting. I am so glad you enjoyed this!
THIS IS SO CUTE

In almost every way possible, let me tell you. You even had me liking Harry/Ginny for a moment, and I don't usually like that couple.

The Tonks/Charlie was brilliant. BRILLIANT.

But the S/R. Oooh, the S/R with the tosser!James was truly a pleasure. It was angry and hesitant and wistful and worried all at once, but the ending was was so hopeful it made up for all the negative feelings. Much love for this story. <3
Aww, thank you for that! I am so glad you enjoyed it!

I am glad the ending made up for the journey.

Thank you so much for commenting!
Oh! This was amazing! I really felt for Sirius in this, especially because he had to watch Remus have a child with and marry his cousin(!) That would be hard for anyone, I'm sure, and more so for a man who lost so many years locked up and lost so many people he loved. I have to admit, I was annoyed with Remus for most of the fic for doing just that, but you redeemed him in the end (which I loved to bits, btw).
It had to be hell for him, poor love. I don't usually put Sirius through the wringer but this just felt like his story to tell, not Remus'.

It is easy to feel a little annoyance at Remus in this, but Sirius played his part as well. I think after the wedding he decided "well, fuck you, too" though he could never let go of their friendship so he held it all in. He wasn't as transparent as he though, but really, who is surprised by that?

Glad the ending made up for it and thank you for the lovely comment.
His eager and caring ambition to help his friends and loved ones, always made so much more difficult by his dorky awkwardness.

This is so very much how I see Harry!

Ahahahaha! Cherub!James is a great visual, though I'm certain he'd be grumpy at both of us for entertaining such a notion.

Thank you very much for reading and leaving a lovely comment.
fave: there were too many words, too many years, and too many graves between them

this was just lovely
That is one of my favorite lines! Thank you for noticing it and thank you for the comment.
I was reading this and crossing my fingers that everything turns out all right in the end. You have captured that feeling perfectly, trying to keep up appearances of happiness because it won't do for the holidays, and it's never good to be the wet blanket. What hurts is that Sirius has retreated inside himself somehow, the poor dear, and I'm glad James was there.

And you wrote Tonks beautifully, actually. That part, please don't spell it out. I changed your nappies once or twice. made me snigger, because in my mind, Tonks is always the kid, not the love interest. I loved fics where Sirius and Remus babysit Tonks, before the 6th book came out. I'm glad that she wasn't a harpy and that her relations with Sirius wasn't soured because of the whole thing.

This is my new canon, actually. James is still there, Tonks is happy with Charlie, we still have Teddy, and Remus is right where he needs to be. \o/
I was reading this and crossing my fingers that everything turns out all right in the end.

I hope you didn't fret too much. You know, like 99.9% of all I write has a happy ending. I can't be mean to Sirius for too long.

I adore Tonks and with Sirius already losing so much, I just can't take what family he does have away from him, you know?

This is my new canon, actually. James is still there, Tonks is happy with Charlie, we still have Teddy, and Remus is right where he needs to be.

*adores you*

Thank you for the lovely comment!
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